Monthly Archives: May 2011

My Skin

African Woman

My skin

It coats my heart with mastery

each inch like Picaso mastered me,

Art on flesh

Sweet ebony!

It has a name or two or three,

I call it mine


Today I felt like dedicating my blog post to my beautiful skin. This weekend I have had a lot of talks with people about culture and heritage and race. All very intriguing conversations that would make one look at themselves in the mirror and realize that they were made specially, unique, and with delicate care. So I thought I might just make it known that I love my skin. I was reminded of a quote by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe that I came across once and it was the simplest truth I had ever heard :

If God had wanted me otherwise, He would have made me otherwise.

So today I urge you to step back from all your day’s troubles, breathe and look at the masterpiece starring back at you in the mirror. We are we and that’s who we should aim to be. Food for thought.

Yours always,


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*Rockstar Therapy*

RockStar GiRL!!

My post on Meditation was all about reconnecting with your mind, being at peace with yourself and mostly quiet things so this post may leave you thinking I am the most inconsistent person in the world with my being Buddha Zen one day and Aerosmith Zealous the next. But I found that Rockstarism is also a therapeutic outlet, they just let go!I found myself envious of their zeal, their strange, their confidence, how they can go out into the scary word and scream in it’s face without even blinking. I found myself enamoured with that rock-star nonchalance that you can’t exactly pick up at the supermarket, fearlessness is something you are either born with our earn from a rough life. I wanted to be like them, one hundred percent indifferent, one hundred percent fearless like the world’s opinions or limits they try to impose were invisible.

I was listening to 30 seconds to Mars and bobbing my head back and forth. I immediately paused the music,parted my hair into a crazy hairstyle, applied the darkest shade of eye-liner I could find around my eyes, wore a ridiculously mismatched outfit and returned to not giving a flying rat’s ass. I must say not only was that dramatic moment theatrical but it is also surprisingly therapeutic. Letting loose like a rock-star for even the slightest moment can really free you from some hoarded sorrows. I felt liberated in that moment, simply shaking my ATM (which according to my aunt means my African Trademark) like I just don’t care because I really just didn’t care. Now I am not saying you should go out, dye your hair some absurd colour, get tatted up and adopt a drug addiction like stereotypes would have you think Rock-stars are all about. I am saying rock-stars can teach you a thing or too about not caring too much and sometimes being carefree is exactly what you need. We spend our lives being stressed out over schedules we made for ourselves, predicaments we put ourselves into and we never really have the time to scream at the word and release that load of stress. We may never have that radical confidence of a rock-star but one download click away can assure us a few minutes of rockstarism once in a while.

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A World Without Gaga


Celebrate all things you don’t like about yourself-love yourself. Gaga

 I set out to thrash Gaga today, denouncing my throne as a Gaga-fanatic so I went on Wikipedia. I had my sites set on finding all the dirt to corroborate my latest decision to dump her. In the first place her outrageous new video “Born this way” did not boil with me. I love that she is always showcasing individuality but I mean there are limits, religion for example is a seriously touchy topic and tackling it like football players tackle each other is just brutal! The horns in her cheeks are also a bit over-the-top and not in a Coco Chanel extravagant way more in a Gaga-needs-a-timeout sort of way. I can except her bisexuality or the fact that she doesn’t wear pants but in my mind she has gone way past my STOP sign and crossed the yellow-tape with that music video. I must admit the lightbulb first turned on in my head when in one of her music videos (Alejandro) she attempted to swallow a rosary. That set off little sparks but “Born this way” oiled the fire so I planned to end this love-hate saga and dump my Lady Gaga (I couldn’t help but RHYME).The Google Goddess was at work but this time it was an angry mission, I was determined to rid myself of all connections to Gaga and I thought I was going to say my final “Ra RA Ooola La”. But then I read a story, her story. Like my all-time favorite Disney Princess ,Pocahontas, said “You’ll learn things you’ve never known you’ve never known” and I did. Her story is a story a little less sparkly than her loud outfits, it was the story of a girl with a dream in the Big Apple. Born Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta Lady Gaga began playing the piano at the age of four, she has practically wrote songs all her life. She dropped out of University to pursue a music career and with difficulty she managed to make it. I found out that she is philanthropist and an advocate, that this working girl has a big heart to go with her grande talent! And then I imagined a Gaga-less world, where red carpet events wouldn’t be as exciting or leave you by the TV wondering “What’s going to Gaga wear?”, where ‘Glee’ wouldn’t have that special episode where Rachel reconnected with her mother via the songs of our beloved Europop sensation. It was a sad world, though imaginary, a world with less flair and many out of work dramatically creative designers .I’m not saying that I don’t find her exhibition of “religious art” highly offensive. Music is a spectacular thing and Gaga may go a bit overboard but there are some things that can’t be stopped and whether I agree with her music all the time or not there are songs of hers that will always be my ultimate feel-good songs (Just Dance!). Like a boomerang she just keeps coming back to my heart. You don’t have to love all of the songs by an artist, lets face it some of our favorite musicians have made songs in the past that cannot for-the-love-of-Grey’s Anatomy grow on us, in that way I may never like “Born this way” but there won’t be stopping my feet from tapping to “Paparazzi” or my body from imitating her dance moves in “Bad Romance”. I decree that once you’ve been BeGagaed there is no turning back!

BTW: Gaga just took Oprah’s slice of the Forbes Cake by topping the annual chart of the most powerful celebrities.

Lady Gaga topples Oprah Winfrey from her No.1 spot on our list, which she’s given up for only the third time in seven years. Gaga is there not just because of the $90 million she earned with a monster tour, but also because of her 32 million Facebook fans and 10 million Twitter followers–aka Little Monsters–who helped move 1 million digital downloads of her recent single “Born This Way” in only five days. They’re also happy to buy the MAC makeup, Monster headphones and Virgin Mobile phones she features in her videos.Forbes

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The Benefits of Meditation

(First and foremost, ladies and gentlemen that is a photo of myself pretending to Meditate)

Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine… Meditate. Live purely. Be quiet. Do your work with mastery.

I am always on the go go go or in lazy mode but never once in between. Moments where I am absolutely still whilst awake are extremely rare and even if I am still there is probably a million and one thoughts stuck in traffic in my head on the verge of going road-rage crazy!! The idea of actually taking moments out of my day to stay put and clear my mind seems unimaginable. My zodiac sign sign [cancer] and my blood type personality [O negative] both agree that I am prone to high stress levels, I didn’t have to rely on the horoscope angle because my family history of medical conditions such as high blood pressure and heart decease did all the convincing. I need to get healthier, both physically and mentally. And apparently freezing time for 15-20 minutes will help me do just that. Being the Google Goddess that I am I go to work and it turns out that they are probably a trillion benefits of Meditation starting with probably the most obvious one: Its 100% free!

There were several benefits so I simply picked out the ones I found tres appealing and here we go yet another Upile list!!:

Physiological Benefits

  • It increases blood flow and slows the heart rate.
  • Reduces anxiety attacks by lowering the levels of blood lactate.
  • Increases exercise tolerance.
  • Decreases muscle tension
  • Helps in chronic diseases like allergies, arthritis etc.
  • Enhances the immune system.
  • Drop in cholesterol levels, lowers risk of cardiovascular disease.
  • Helps with weight loss
  • Cures headaches and migraines
  • Greater oderliness of Brain functioning
  • Decreases ageing process

Psychological Benefits

  • Builds self-confidence
  • Increases serotonin level, influences mood and behaviour.
  • Helps focus and concentration
  • Increased emotional stability
  • React more quickly and effectively to stressful situations
  • Decrease in potential mental illness
  • Increases will power
  • Less aggressiveness
  • Improved learning ability and memory
  • Helps cure insomnia
  • Greater tolerance
  • Decrease in worry and restless thinking
  • Improves your personal relationships

Spiritual Benefits

  • Helps living in the present moment
  • Helps put things in perspective
  • Provides peace of mind, happiness
  • You grow wiser
  • Creates a widening deepening capacity of love
  • Experience a sense of ‘Oneness’
  • Increased self-actualization

Now is it just me or does all this make you want to find a little corner and block the world out for 20 tops?

Starting tomorrow I am doing right by Buddha and myself and meditating. I  used to pass up the opportunity to make myself healthier before,exercise because I was too lazy ,diets because I wasn’t disciplined enough but I think it is about time I turn the tables around and meditate! Join me.

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Wood Anemone (via Garden Muse)

Check out that pretty flower!

Wood Anemone The perennial Wood Anemone (Anemone quinquefolia) flowers in spring and summer and is from the Ranunculaceae family. Quinquefolia, from the Latin quinque, means “five,” and references the five petals of the flower. It is also called Mayflower, Windflower and Nightcaps. It does well in rich, moist soil in woodland and shade gardens. Photographed in the Woodland Garden at Meadowlark Botanical Gardens © Cindy Dyer. All rights reserved. … Read More

via Garden Muse


Bob Marley X How To Love A Woman (via iRok Fashion)

I love Bob Marley. His words are totally amazing!

Bob Marley X How To Love A Woman Sweet nothings… "You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect – you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but s … Read More

via iRok Fashion

*Know Your Blood Type*

I remember when I was younger I always grew so envious whenever one of my siblings was sick and the attention transferred. I know you must be thinking “You little monster” and you are probably right but I was a kid who always yarned a colossal amount of attention and to me being loved meant being noticed. I used to envy kids with a medical condition, not a disability more of a unique medical thing about them because I thought being special would earn me all the attention I could ever need. If I had one my mother would tend to my meals and say “Upile doesn’t eat that” and protect me from my brother by saying “Don’t play rough, we don’t want to hurt our little Princess”. Now I truly understand the “Be careful what you wish for” saying because in turn I did get what I wished for. You can stay on your seats and please refrain form crying it isn’t necessarily a biggie, it could be worse. You see that difference I’d always wished for was inside of me, my blood type.

Last week over a social dinner with my cousins somehow the topic of blood type came on the table. I am ever so curious about medical conditions and one of my cousins happens to be a doctor. The question was casually asked “What’s your blood type Upile?” and my answer came in “O negative“. Hmmm I myself did not understand the complexity of my blood type just that I could give blood to a person with any type of blood. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury that was the mere surface. “That means you can only have one child” my cousin said not knowing that then and there she was breaking my heart and sledge-hammering the imaginary life I had gingerly created. A life filled with children and bliss, children whom I had already named , children that felt very real to me. “One child!” it was more a whisper than a scream. An enigmatic me hoped that she was just joking but ney doctors don’t joke about medicine not even socially. She went on to explain that my body may allow the first child but my blood may make up antibodies and tackle the next child like a virus. I listened hoping to hear the loophole, the magic door that would lead to my pre-designed imaginary house with my cherished imaginary children. Tada! There is one. But it can’t be trusted fully. I would have to take some pills during my third trimester with the first child, then within 72 hours after that child’s delivery then again when I am with child. This process would have to be continued.

There are more biological terms that I googled. (I wonder why the Cambridge dictionary hasn’t yet added ‘googled’ as a word or ‘facebooked). The bottom line is that my blood is a barrier and it may affect my dreams of having children. I felt absolutely betrayed by my body upon hearing this news. I advice you all to find out your blood types, O negative is a rare blood type only 7% of the world’s population have it. In my little trip of enlightenment I found out that there are special diets from each individual blood type. One more thing I found out is that O negative  can only get blood from O negative which is something worth knowing because this is a rare blood type. Upon hearing this piece of news my father said “Be careful”, his stern eyes warning in a way that made the attention-seeking younger version of myself ever-so-happy.

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The List

I was curious about the list of the most read books of all time so I went on a self-enlightening mission. I managed to,yes, Google it and come up with a list of books I would like to read before I die. Yes that doesn’t seem very 16 year old of me but sometimes I feel I’m an old soul trapped in the body of a goddess, lol. Here is the list, the books I have cancelled out I have read. This list is summarized, it consists of the books I know are in my local library and so as soon as I am done with this list I have several more to complete.

  1. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
  2. 1984 by George Orwell
  3. Catch 22 by Joseph Heller
  4. Dune by Frank Herbert
  5. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
  6. Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen
  7. Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen
  8. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D.Salinger
  9. Animal Farm by George Orwell
  10. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
  11. Beloved by Toni Morrison
  12. Gone with the wind by Margaret Mitchell
  13. Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
  14. Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov
  15. Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky
  16. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
  17. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
  18. Les Miserables by Victor Hugo
  19. The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky
  20. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy
  21. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy [I’m Reading this!!]
  22. Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
  23. The Great Gatsby by F.Scott Fitzgerald
  24. The Children of Men by P.D. James
  25. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
  26. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  27. Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes
  28. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
  29. Mobby Dick by Herman Melvile
  30. Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
  31. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
  32. Emma by Jane Austen
  33. Persuasion by Jane Austen
  34. To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
  35. Madame Bavary by Gustave Flaubert
  36. Tess of the D’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy
  37. Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  38. David Copperfield by Charles Dickens
  39. Middlemarch by George Elliot
  40. The Three Musketeers by Mikhail Bulgakov
  41. The Twilight Saga by Stephanie Meyer
  42. The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver
  43. Journey to the End of the Night by Louis Ferdinand Celine
  44. Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer
  45. Nostromo by Joseph Conrad
  46. The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri
  47. The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne
  48. A Doll’s House by Henrik Ibsen
  49. Lord Jim by Joseph Conrad
  50. Kim by Rudyard Kipling
  51. Parade’s End by Ford Madox Ford
  52. The Secret Agent by Joseph Conrad
  53. Pale Fire by Vladimir Nabokov
  54. Point Counter Point by Aldous Huxley
  55. From Here to Eternity by James Joyce
  56. The Bridge of San Luis Rey by Thornton Wilder
  57. The Good Soldier by Ford Madox Ford
  58. The Golden Bowl by Theodore Dreister
  59. A Passage to India by E.M. Forster
  60. The Wings of the Dove by Henry James
  61. Brideshead Revisited by Robert Heinlein
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Only Minutes (via PoetLeeProse)

I’m discovering true talent on this site. i love it!!

Only Minutes The clock read five minutes till three in the afternoon. It was five minutes since you told me I wasn’t unique. It’s been six minutes since I smiled. Three in the afternoon, now I cry. – Prose … Read More

via PoetLeeProse